990 Nishtha for Humility and Soul's Position from
Swami Gaurangapada on
Vimeo.
Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya
My Dear Lord I need your mercy even to offer prayers to you. Like once
in Mayapur, Mahaprabhu showed his Varaha form to Murari Gupta and he
told Murari to say prayers, to glorify him. So Murari said, I need your
mercy to glorify you. So instead of glorifying the Lord he was
explaining his own position. For some time he was saying, I am so fallen
how can I glorify you.
The more we advance in Bhakti, when we
reach the stage of nistha, we start to have some realisation of our atma
tattva and when we have realisation of our atma tattva, we feel how
insignificant we are, how worthless and useless we are, tiny particles
of the Lord. So then that Bhava automatically arises in our heart.
Actually when we go near an ocean, before we go into the ocean we are
thinking that the ocean must be this deep, but then we enter into the
ocean and then we realise how deep the ocean is. Similarly the deeper we
go into bhakti, the more we realise how minute we are, how
insignificant we are.
My Dear Lord, for you I am very
insignificant,but for me, please hear my prayers, because for me they
are very important, because for me you are my only hope. You can live
without me, but I can not live without you. This is what our acharyas
say, that we render seva to the Lord because we need it more than the
Lord needs it. Even though the Lord is more anxious to accept the
service and bring us to him, but it is for our sake that he is anxious,
not for his sake.
So it is a very secret thing that he is praying to the Lord that it is for my sake.
My dear Lord if you neglect me, because you are considered 'dayamay' by
nature, by nature you are merciful according to Bhaktivinode Thakur in
Jaiva Dharma, madhurya rasa has 2 classifications,madhurya and audarya.
So when madurya is predominant and audarya is in the background, then
the madhurya rasa is manifested in the form of krishna. And when audarya
is predominant and madhurya is also there, the Lord becomes Gauranga.
Ultimately the Lord is full of madhurya rasa, this is the basic
characteristic of the Lord. But even in Krishnas form when madhurya is
predominant, still the characteristic of 'daya' is still there, the
audarya is still there.
he krishna karuna sindhu....this doesnt
mean that because his madhurya is predominant that his karuna has been
hidden.It is still manifested, the only thing is that in the form of
krishna he is more busy in relishing his own Lilas, so the audarya
aspect is in the background, but still krishna is 'dayamay'.
As
Gauranga Mahaprabhu he is relishing sweetness in the way of
distributing it by Nama Sankirtan. Nama sankirtan is something you can
relish, but the main occupation is to distribute it. Whereas the rasa
Lila is something that is to be relished more and the distribution is
very very limited. Even the great souls like Shiva, have to stand
outside the rasa mandala. So both are different manifestations of the
supreme Lord, but both have mercy.
the mercy has 2
classifications, doya and kripa. Doya means we ask for it like is being
asked in these prayers. I am a qualified recipient for your mercy
because I am fallen. So like when Bhaktivinode Thakur sings, patita
pavana, there is nobody more fallen than me.
Sometimes devotees
say that you should not claim to be the most of anything, otherwise
that is also a show, but the acharyas really feel that they are the most
fallen. If you read Krishna das Kaviraj Goswamis Chaitanya
Charitamrita, I started crying when I read that, he said that I am more
fallen than the worm in the stool, because the worm in the stool is
actually honest and fallen, but I am making duplicity. Anyone who takes
my name gets sinful reactions, and anyone who hears my name, immediately
all auspiciousness goes out from his body.
So the acharyas are
actually feeling it when they say it, though they are not actually
fallen, but they are feeling that. Because according to Visvanath
Chakravati and Jiva Goswami, the real definition of humility is when one
is very advanced, still one feels very low. That is real humility. When
one is already low and one says I am low, that is not humility, that is
a fact. If one is low, but makes a show of saying I am the most fallen,
then that is also not humility.
But when one is very advanced,
and because of that advancement one knows the minute nature of the soul
and from the depths of the soul one is saying that I am very very
fallen, that is actual humility.
It is very beautiful,
ultimately after pouring out ones feelings to the lord, then the devotee
is giving the Lord some incentive to have mercy on him or her. the
devotee prays, My dear lord, if you neglect me, if you dont have mercy
on me, then how will your name of Patita Pavana be successful because I
am the most needful of your mercy. So the devotee reminds the Lord on
the stage of nistha of why his name is 'Dayamay'. Your name is Dayamay,
just to give mercy on souls like me.
This kind of vandana
Bhakti, these kind of prayers are very important, because they are
actually a means to convince the Lord. Ultimately the Lord has
independent desire, but our bhajan, our chanting, our prayers, do help
in convincing the lord. So when the Lord feels that the devotee is
praying with genuine humility...in Chaitanya Charitamrita, the
definition of humility is mentioned by Gauranga Mahaprabhu himself. he
says that one who has pure love for the lord, one who has pure
attraction for the Lord, beginning from the stage of nistha, the more we
advance from the stage of nistha, when we advance more becoming humble,
there is no limit to humility, it keeps on expanding.
The
ultimate limit of humility, is the one who has prema, he will say that
he does not even have a drop of prema and he will actually mean it.
gauranga Mahaprabhu said that the very fact that I am living without
Krishna means that I have no prema. If I had real prema then every
moment I would be with Krishna, but I am living sperately, so I am not a
devotee because I am living without krishna.
One of the characteristics of Bhava Bhakti is that the devotee can not live even a single moment without Krishna
